Well today was interesting. Not a bad day, nothing to complain about, but some interesting things happened.

First, I received some very nice cards from my children, one of which was signed “Love, Yana” and she wrote it was from “Flower” too! I almost cried.

Later, while at my Mom’s, Mom tells me that her friend’s daughter, whom I never met, participated in a walk for Cancer and she entered my name as the person she was walking for. Whoa! That was weird. I had to ask my mom again, “Who did she walk for?” I wasn’t sure I heard her right. She said something like, “You! Well, you did have cancer.” I said, “Yeah, I remember, I just wasn’t sure who you said.” LOL Dan looks at me and says something like, “That’s weird to hear someone did a cancer walk for you.” No kidding! That was weird. I said she probably didn’t know anyone else with cancer and wanted to do the walk and thought, “Hmmm...I don’t know who to say I am walking for” and her mom said, “Oh, well Tina’s daughter had cancer, why don’t you put her name.” LOL  I haven’t a clue. Anyway, interesting number one.

Then my dad picked up my Grandmother to join us. Grandma is 91 and has Alzeimers. She is doing pretty well considering but she of course is “forgetful” but also will have a thought and kind of get stuck on it...for the day. Well today’s thought apparently was, “Oh Michelle, you are SO beautiful. You really are. Oh my gosh, you are so beautiful, I just love you soo much. I do, I really love you.” She almost made me cry. I love my Grandma so much. It’s hard in times like that not to think that she could leave us any day now. At least there is no doubt that she loves me and that she know I love her too. The look in her eye will be unforgettable, she just really looked like her heart was going to burst with all that love inside.

Next we head to dinner. The restaurant is about a mile from Mom and Dad’s. Since they do not take reservations, we sent Dad and Dan ahead to see if there was a wait. There wasn’t. When we arrived, the men were already seated with their drinks. The server comes over asks for our drink order and leaves to get them. I tell Dan, “She looks like Marni (my best friend who passed away in December from breast cancer)”. He said, “I know. I told your dad I wondered how long before you noticed.” Dinner was so hard, I just wanted to cry and I mean bawl. I did cry, then I would take deep breaths and be okay, only to end up crying again when our server would come back. I said if I didn’t look at her I would be okay, because she didn’t sound like Marni, but I couldn’t stop myself from looking at her. Let’s just say that it really was not fun for me. Out of all the servers in the restaurant, why did we get her? I was facing the corner of the restaurant and didn’t have to see any other server; there must be a reason but heck if I know what it was. I am just so sad, I miss her so much and my heart aches for her daughter who just experienced her first Mother’s Day without her mommy.

Later we come home and I spend time catching up on the FRUA board. After checking in the Non-Mom thread, I head to the website. For those of you who don’t know, NBC had a show on tonight, sponsored by Teleflora for “America’s Favorite Mom” contest. There has been voting all week for mom’s of various categories: The Working Mom, The Single Mom, The C.E.O. (Chairman of everything) Mom, and originally had a category for “Non-mom Moms” which were to include grandparent, neighbor, step mom, or mom to adopted or foster children, but eventually changed to “Adopting Moms” due to many complaints. I was one of the many who complained about this “Non-mom” title (though I figured they were trying to be short with “non-traditional mom”) and a horrendous, short description about one of the nominees in this category. Here is the letter I sent in:

I am writing to you today in regard to this "Non-Mom Mom" category name NBC has for this show in which you are sponsoring. I am absolutely appalled by the insensitivity of the producers to allow such an offensive title to be given to mom's who give their hearts to children not biologically their own. I am a stepparent and an adoptive parent (as well as a biological parent) and to think that anyone would categorize my mothering for my children that are not biologically my own as "less than" by using such names as "non-mom mom" is hurtful, disrespectful and completely inappropriate. This type of “talk” is not only belittling to such mothers but to the children to whom they parent. If we are “non-moms” then we have “non-children”, some who then would not have any mom.

What amazes me is how this ever went from being one naive person’s idea to getting a collaborative “approval” from NBC and then supported by your company, which I will no longer use.

As if that wasn’t sick enough, this brief description of a “Non-mom mom” that states, “She was an adopted child who is now mom to her own daughter, plus six adopted children who started life as "meth babies"” is outrageous.! “Meth babies”? Her “own” daughter? Are you kidding? They are ALL her OWN children. To refer to these children as “meth babies” for the purpose of keeping it short and to the point, is disgusting. These are real children, with real lives and real hearts. This is completely despicable.

I hope that TeleFlora not only educates themselves on appropriate language but makes a very public category name change, on air with much apologies, at the very least.

Michelle

Real mom to 5 beautiful, worthy, real children.

I put FIVE children because if neighbors are included in this “non-mom” category, then my mothering to “Flower” should be included.

Anyway, I had received an apology email from Teleflora, which I found is now posted on the “America Favorite Mom” website. As I mentioned above, the “Non-mom” category was changed to “Adopting Mom” (not a fan of this change but it certainly is much better) but tonight I also found they changed the description for the mother I spoke about in my letter. To me that was the real victory. It now states:

“She has seven children, six of whom were adopted and exposed to methamphetamines in the womb and were born meth positive.”

Whew, it’s been a long day! Time to blog hop then head to bed. Happy Mama’s Day ladies, especially to those expecting mom’s who will be bringing their “babies” home over the next few months!